Out of the Box

Listening to the TED ex talk by Professor Giovanni really was so interesting and inspirational nudging me in a new direction. I felt it was challenging me to look beyond the comfort parameters that surround me at times in a society that says don't you dare!  Since I have been a student of spiritual sciences I have read about changes in peoples lives when they touch that part of the unknown or unfamiliar.
The process of trust matters especially in oneself is an ongoing process it just keeps becoming easier. As dancers we are always delving into the creative, the unknown and Professor Giovanni's talk actually made me realize that creative thinking is a constant in our training, teaching, performing and choreography, maybe at times we have taken it for granted and lost focus of it in awareness. 

                                         Life begins at the end of you comfort zone 
                                          (N.D.Walsch)

To know that it is possible to train oneself and trust the process of stepping into the creative thinking zone, breaking all conditioned barriers that have been instilled through subconscious absorption since childhood and be exposed to realms that have been lying dormant, sounds very scary but for me doing the MAPP degree online learning has exactly been that. Coming form convergent to divergent thinking has been quite a journey.


Long thinking a new term for me was interesting it took me into an unlimited feeling like when I am in meditation open, flowing, free, sometimes difficult to sustain on a daily basis.

Module 3

Returning after a summer break from teaching and a severe frozen shoulder. It has been very hard having the very hand i write with slow down. I have been through consistent treatment of physio therapy which has brought back at 90% of my writing strength which i am exercising now writing on my blog.
I just pray that i see and complete this module effortlessly too.
Thinking about my critical review and questioning what is a professional artefact has been on my mind racing around like a dog after his tail.
This MAPP degree has opened my mind and increased my awareness around studying and the depth required to really go in and explore new ways and methods not only in my studies but in my life.
I see that this learning has expanded my vision and approach to my future.

My thoughts on Positivist and Non- positivist approaches

Reading through my handbook of module 2 over and over 

It is overwhelming  doing a dance inquiry  so many elements need to be understood as in what methodologies need to be applied, the code of ethics around acquiring the data etc. I have started to get my head into the concepts such as action based, case study, ethnography, ethnomethodology, grounded and narrative Inquiry and what would be the most suitable making notes and reading the core text Bell, J A guide for the first time researcher.
I am sure many of us are still going through the process of deeper understanding and defining our research titles and content for our chosen subjects. I wonder how are you all doing?? it would be nice to know?

I made notes on how i perceive a positivist and non- positivist and attempt to put my thoughts here as  to come back to...
 I reflected on the fact that even though it is made clear that just having one approach is not whether it is right or wrong but a different perspective on how we all see reality and what is truth for us collectively or individually.
Reading on the approach  of different theories that certain philosophers had from Aristotle to Karl Marx opened me into a larger understanding.
The mind being dominant for some and for others the body.

The understanding of  a positivist approach everything is certain and fixed whether we are there or not while the non-positivist approach  brings to light that there are a number of elements, we are involved in the change and impact as we are in the experience.

I turn in to look at what is my stance on I feel that we surf in between both polarities at times and are never totally fully immersed in one. this brings to my mind the yin yang symbol the yin within the yang and the yang within the yang.

 I feel we may start out with a fixed parameter as we are born into a family, a certain tradition, a lifestyle. We are taught certain habits and conform to ritual and demands within  our society in different cultures, but it eventually changes as we start to grow and discover ourselves. We develop along to what ever we feel, we start acting and responding outside of the fixed reality, slowly shifting  we  start to change the impact shifts while we are in the the realm of experience. We may be confronted with positivist stances, but eventually new ideas, new experiences and different outcomes change the scenario.
In my teaching dance, or performing, I can see how things have come about due to my presence in the whole scenario. What my mind, my body, my environment has impacted me or made me think, or feel establishes the fact that all experience is intertwined.Since dance is feeling based as well and comes through experiencing my body there have been elements of religion and cultural norms that have affected and influenced the way i move, or the themes I chose to dance or work with.
I still reflect and dig deeper into the dualist mind where the the body is controlled by the mind with all the labels around it are not to feel, not be happy, to be sensuous, the body a tool for sin, in the religious context of history. I recognize the same elements in a Pakistani Muslim society where religion dictates the ways of the body and keeps the whole of society stuck in the mind, controlling it by continuous conditioned rhetoric.

sacred sufi: sunday skype March 3rd Theories and Frameworks

sacred sufi: sunday skype March 3rd Theories and Frameworks: Theories and Frameworks Sunday's discussion was all about theories and frameworks, very stimulating questions, reflections and comme...

sunday skype March 3rd Theories and Frameworks

Theories and Frameworks

Sunday's discussion was all about theories and frameworks, very stimulating questions, reflections and comments on this subject that  pushed  deeper into reflection. what is a framework? how is it defined ? what theories support it ?
Do frameworks changes along with it's theories? it was interesting for me to see how i found that if i had a limited perspective on a certain angle it would open along the discussion and i could see a new color, like i had been given a new set of eyes.
Educational frameworks, life frameworks, art frameworks, environment frameworks and all the unlimited amount of theories that support it. What comes first the theories or the frameworks or is it the other way around? does the framework give birth to the theories, or the theories to the framework? one thing that became clear to me we all are in a framework.... it even exists in our bodies and outside of us.... but we have the choice to play around with it, change it adapt it, make it large, make it small, there could be a framework within a framework, or multiple existing at one time, we can move from an old one to a new one, we can let go of one that has been given and re-create a new one. A framework is positive and good to lead the way, it challenges us to stay there or move beyond, if i relate it to my dance experiences in performance or even teaching no frame work stayed the same every-time each student came in with their own framework I would feel the need to sometimes adjust mine to them and at times they to mine. An exchange of frameworks, a sharing of frameworks and thus exploring each other's frameworks so as to both benefit and grow into a new framework. In Performance at times i felt the need to shrink the framework so as to fit into the cultural one that existed around me culturally and religiously.
Theories yes are supportive and activate that part of us that tries to find reasoning, concrete experiences experienced and helps us to take off in a certain direction. They can become our reference points to get into the framework, understand it apply it and i am sure so much more.
I am still deeply reflecting on this and observing its impact on me...

Body positivism my reflections

Right now I have been tremendously ill for the last 10 days a throat infection that has moved into my chest. Heavy antibiotics and bed rest has been the call of the day. This has put me into a mode of deep reflection reading through my hand book for module 2....
Body positivism......I  remember using this as a core element in one of my dance pieces that spoke of shame as a woman.... Where her body is the main focus of attention. She is flooded with other females voices from different times of history who tell her to accept the status quo.. in a Muslim society the body as an extension of human self  to express is looked down upon it is considered a sin to show your body or even be confident about it... it is the grounds of where all illicit ideas are germinated... How do you separate yourself from your own body that wants to be....... to just express..... to be free to feel space.... to extend ..... My dance piece Purdah was my way of channelling and depicting what I felt about my body, the rules , the feelings that were aroused, the restrictions. The desire to break down, express beyond all the boundaries to break the frame work of society.... This reflection brought me to Martha Graham and her dance the way she had made what for some looked ugly in the body look beautiful.... She saw beauty in the most unusual usage and distortion of body application that she experimented with.... Since her father's background as a movement pysco analyst..... he had great influence in her life which made her question and push the boundaries of safe movement and a nice looking body dancing with defined lines and grace.... Dance was far from a body looking pretty her concepts about gravity and our relationship to the floort this pull was always part and parcel in her work she would throw the body to the ground in a thunderous manner. Her dancers were creatures of the earth constantly searhing for equilibrium.
The application of contraction and release in movement of her dance technique to hold and let go to tighten and flow...
Graham's dance depicted the dichotomies in life, desire and duty fear and courage.
The body would push boundaries her concepts her purpose of dance was to translate emotional experience in physical form ... This for me breaks all boundaries since nothing is right or wrong it's what we as dancers bring into the dance what we feel about our bodies where do we want to play with our bodies and to which extent are we willing to explore outside the influences of a conditioned society about our bodies and what's correct in its usage ...  

Feed back thoughts and reflections

Completing the MAPP 1st module wow was the first feeling, it's done never thought i would get through it! had so many doubts, will i be able to write ? does my writing make sense. have i understood the module.... I hope it reads right and makes sense.... imagine all this going through my head....well the feedback form came and to my surprise the comments actually surprised me in certain areas the fact that my writing did make sense and was used well. Phew! felt a relief that it actually turned out to be a well written overview and reflection on my prior learning and along with the experience of module 1 as written in the feedback to students...
So many things happened during this module a tremendous amount of growth and interesting research approach methods that were totally new to me... i never truly realized the importance of researching and reflecting deep at a wider context of my experience. This opened my mind to the world view point and an analytical approach to life and all my experiences be them emotional, mental, work related, relationships, business, my teaching, my performance.
I have definitely changed as a person after completing the 1st module i was standing behind a wall of self created fear that it's impossible.
Reading the comments gave me a look into me and how i was seeing and delivering, what i was understanding and seeing and what i had missed out on what needs improvement, what needs more attention, where do i lack an area of application.
I am really deeply happy that i got this opportunity to finally cross over to the barrier of low self esteem in the educational aspect of my dance or work experience and see the importance as the experience being the education.... This has brought so much more confidence to move on and forward.
I know that at times blogging was hard for me and difficult or new yet it really always helped me with a true voicing and getting me to arrange my thoughts and reflections around the course and tasks.
The feedback form has really put a lot of things into perspective for me and given me guidelines on areas that need my attention and that these are not classroom tasks but spaces where they become part of the process in helping to go back and reflect and refer back to... to have notes that become part of the writing used along the course.
I feel i have somehow been a little too technical in my understanding of the handbook and at times became too clinical in the literature application. I have become aware of the need to move beyond this and only going through the process has shed light on it...
I feel i need to be more involved in all the monthly discussions as they really help in connecting to other participants and open up on different angles of anything being discussed. its was most encouraging aspect as well.
Since the submitting of my 1st module i have found that i have changed a lot as if i am thinking differently analyzing more, observing more, and more critical about my work with a positive perspective...
I tend to apply myself more and look at my dance and teaching with more depth, and make notes regularly too to organize my thoughts around what's happening in class. I look at everything with a lot more observation and involvement....
I feel that the comments on my feedback have also got me thinking and planning for the next module.. I have been structoring my schedule  ahead.
I really look forward to the 2nd module and going deeper into the course.